Gym Pound

I have a Gym Pound. This is not a pound in the sense of ‘some coin’. It is the hallowed purpose of this coin to be used for the locker at the Gym.

‘Where’s Gym Pound?’

Goes the frantic cry in our house.

‘I’ve got Gym Pound!’

Gym pound has saved the day. Serving a noble purpose, guarding my belongings and freeing me to go out and exercise.

Now Gym Pound is not always the same coin. It’s not a hereditary title passed down through primogeniture like the penguin Nils Olav at Edinburgh Zoo. Nils Olav and the Nils Olavs before him have been mascots of the Norwegian Royal Guard. Over the years Nils Olav has risen to the ranks of Colonel-in-Chief. The latest Nils Olav has been a made knight and therefore is Sir Nils Olav and he has been described by the King of Norway as a penguin “…in every way qualified to receive the honour and dignity of knighthood.” He was dubbed with a sword, as the BBC drolly says, ‘where his shoulders should be.’

No, Gym Pound is more like the judges of the Old Testament, someone who steps up in a time of strife – not a hereditary King or an elected official but someone who would step into the breach to preside and to act, often to protect the people. Gym Pound is like that.

Gym Pound lives on – as the coin in the time of need when you dip into your wallet. Chosen to take on a noble task for a short time. Gym Pound is humble, not used to buy lavish things or participate in any kind of quantitative easing. Gym Pound is unconcerned with upturns and downturns. It doesn’t Lord it over you and then let you down (like many of the Old Testament Kings). Gym Pound is stoic and there when you need it.

I was distraught today when Gym Pound fell in the line of duty. Hastily put into a duff locker with no key that would then not surrender it. We lost a good pound today.

With heavy heart I trooped to the main desk to let the lady know. Perhaps there was someone who could rescue Gym Pound?

And then, having listened to my tale, she pulled Gym Pound – called again – from the till and handed it to me!

Gym Pound returns to serve another day.

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